There are two kinds of messages that you can take away from the Landmark Forum.
One includes in-your-face, confrontational teachings about our lack of authenticity. For example:
- You are a jerk.
- Your life is about making yourself right and making other people wrong — at the cost of being in relationship with them.
- You run rackets by complaining constantly about circumstances in your life and playing the victim.
- You also get payoffs from your rackets, such as getting people to do what you want and evading the consequences of your actions.
However, some people will prefer the second set of messages. These hold out a possibility of what we can be rather than judging what we currently do.
A prime example is the “seven distinctions of being an unreasonable and extraordinary human being”:
- Integrity. Honor your word. Promise to do things that make a contribution to the world and keep those promises. If you break a promise, then do what it takes to clean up the mess. Follow up by making new promises.
- Racket-free. Notice the early warning signs of running a racket, such as losing your sense of humor. Give up your need to be right all the time. And if you are right, then don’t get attached.
- Powerful. We often try to get what we want from other people by using force, applying pressure, begging, or conning. Instead, make direct requests with straight communication and then take what you get.
- Courageous. It’s normal for people to feel fear, especially when doing what it takes to keep big promises. Extraordinary people acknowledge the fear and act anyway.
- Peaceful. We can be centered even in the midst of chaos. The key is dealing with what is (the facts about our circumstances) rather than what should be (our expectations). In short, give up the interpretation that something is wrong.
- Charismatic. People will know when you’re mindful, fully present in the moment, and practicing deep listening without judgment. This is the essence of charisma.
- Enrolling. Successful persuasion means sharing possibilities that touch, move, and inspire others.
- I’m a Jerk, You’re a Jerk — Reflections on the Landmark Forum
- I’m Nothing, You’re Nothing — Further Reflections on the Landmark Forum
- Remembering the Landmark Forum — Understanding Our Core Issues
- Further Notes on the Landmark Forum
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